The Top 10 Rights You Don’t Have

1.To have your needs met.

No matter how legitimate you feel they are, or how obligated you feel the other party is to you, it isn’t a requirement, and sometimes isn’t even possible. Learn to meet your own needs!

2.To feel good about everything all the time.

You can survive negative emotions (they don’t last long), and taking your emotional temperature all the time is counter-productive.

3.To be the center of the universe.

There are always other people, and other wills to consider. Be willing to be the trailer sometimes, not the main attraction. It isn’t always about you.

4.To have your expectations met.

The lower your expectations, in fact, the better you’re likely to feel, because then you can only be happily surprised. Deal with intention, not expectations. How you intend to be, and act; not how you expect things to be, or others to act. You can experience great joy planning a trip. When it doesn’t live up to your expectations, be glad you had the planning process! As Eisenhauer (US president) said, planning is useless, but necessary.

5.To dish out what you don’t want to get back.

Self-fulfilling prophecies are all too often true. If you’re bitter and cynical and expect the worst, that’s likely what you’re going to get. If you expect the best from others, that’s also what you’re likely to get.

6.Justice.

Yes, it’s supposedly one of your inalienable rights, but that’s not always what you’ll get in real life. Bad things do happen to good people. However, quite often if you look back on events, you will see they worked out for the best in the long run. While life is not always fair, there is a sort of rough justice out there. It takes perspective, however …

7.To lie and sleep well at night.

Authenticity has its own rewards, one of them being that you can look in the mirror and like the person you look at.

8.To judge and criticize others and feel good about yourself.

When we judge others, we’re asking for the same in return. It’s often allied to perfectionism, which is a formula designed to make you miserable. Demanding perfection of yourself or anyone else is a sure-fire way to be unhappy.

9.Unconditional love.

Even Freud said the only true love was that of a mother for her son (he being a son, of course, to a mother.) Aside from that there are always "conditions" to mortal love and that’s just something you’ll have to deal with.

10.To not be bored.

Your boredom is in your own hands, or rather in your own brain. You must keep generating new experiences and challenges for yourself, and learn to look at old things with new eyes. Your brain needs just the same workout as your body does. Studies are showing we can keep generating new cells and new connections throughout our lifetime WITh the right stimulation.

New toys and new playmates must constantly be sought! Get out of your field, and out of your element often enough to keep yourself interested. It’s up to you!

About the Author

©Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, internet courses, teleclasses and ebooks on Emotional Intelligence.
Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for free ezine (put “ezine” for subject line). I train and certify EQ coaches. Email me for info on this fast, affordable, no-residency program.