How to Successfully Live Today...TODAY! (i--mail article)

Article Title: How to Successfully Live Today...TODAY!
Author Name: Doug C. Grant
Contact Email Address: doug @dougcgrant.com
Word Count: 831
Category: Motivational/Inspirational
© Doug C. Grant, 2002
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How to Successfully Live Today...TODAY!
(from the ‛i-mail' files)

by Doug C. Grant

"Caught you, didn't I?"

Another intrusive i-mail had arrived. I was in the middle of doing what I considered to be an extraordinarily good job of relaxing on our balcony. But the i-mail message took care of that. Unlike e-mail, which can be ignored or deleted, my internal i-mail demands immediate attention.

"You didn't catch me doing anything but relaxing," I muttered in response to Other-Self's accusation. "And I don't appreciate the interruption."

"You weren't relaxing and you know it. You've got everyone upset down here. Stomach is really in a stew."

"Oh, come now, I was simply wool gathering."

"Perhaps. But all your wool was getting knotted up in angry thoughts about the money you lost last September."

"Okay. So I'm still a little ticked. I was lied to. I've got a right to nurse some hard feelings."

"Who gave you that right?"

Other-Self has a way of asking such questions. Of course I didn't have an answer so I decided on belligerence as my defense. "I've got every right. I was hurt."

"Oh, that's really smart. You were hurt so now you're going to hurt yourself again and again by dwelling on the same hurt. Not only that, but you've just wasted a half-hour composing all sorts of bitter accusations and put-downs for yelling at someone you'll probably never see again."

"Yeah...well, I like to be prepared. Just in case. Besides, making up a lot of nasty things to say makes me feel better."

"Maybe you're getting some mental lollipops out of the exercise but not us. The way I figure it, you've just needlessly aged your body 104 minutes during your half-hour of anger-stress. Send down a few more such thoughts and you can go for the full two hours."

"Hey, I don't need to listen to this. I'm the one up here having to wrestle with all the anger thoughts. And they aren't going away just because I tell them to."

"Of course they will. You just haven't tried."

"TRY! What's to try. Angry thoughts just come. So what am I supposed to do? Sit around in a coma?"

"Let me put it this way. What would you do if a dirty, unshaven sinister looking bum knocked on your front door and demanded to live with you?"

"I'd slam the door in his face."

"Very good. Now ask yourself this. Did you have any control over whether that bum knocked on your door or not? Don't bother to answer. Of course you didn't. The only real choice you had was whether to invite him in or slam the door."

"I see your point and maybe that might work...sometimes. But I'm still so angry about getting conned out of my money that I can't help thinking about it."

"Well isn't that interesting. You've just admitted that you're a spineless wimp controlled by a free-wheeling brain. That's too bad. I really thought we had something going between us."

"That's not fair. Can I help it if my anger is so strong that the thoughts keep returning?"

"No. But what would you do if the bum kept returning?"

"I suppose I'd keep slamming the door."

"Well, finally a smart answer. Now, let me ask this. If you keep slamming the door in that bum's face, what do you think he will eventually do?"

"Go away, I suppose."

"Are you beginning to get the picture?"

"Yeah...except you make this thought avoidance business sound like a cake walk."

"It is, actually. The only thing hard is persistence. Right now shut and lock the door of your mind to all your yesterdays. Visualize the door actually closing but leave a small window for peeking back at warm memories and successful experiences.

"Next, close the door on all your tomorrows. But again, leave a small window for productive planning and goal setting.

"Your life is now enclosed in a single room. But it's the best room possible because it's the only real place you can live. It's called ‛Today'."

"Okay, sounds neat and all that. But I've been across the hall enough to know that two minutes after locking away my past and future the angry thoughts will come roaring back."

"Of course they will. That's to be expected. But who says you have to live with them? Just stand on the other-side of your ‛Today' door and shout, "Go away!" Five minutes later you may have to do the same thing again...and again. But with persistence, the thoughts will disappear forever.

"Well...I'll give it a try. But it won't be easy. It's so hard to keep from thinking about my money and that lying piece of crude. I can see him now stretched out beside a pool in some warm climate just..."

"Excuse me, but perhaps you didn't notice. Your ‛Today' just snuck out an open door."
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About the Author

Doug C. Grant retired from a successful career as a nationally recognized business writer & marketing consultant. He now helps members of the ‛Over-50', crowd live healthier, happier and more productive lives through his Empowered Maturity Web Site (http://www.dougcgrant.com) and an on-line interactive seminar.